Monday, November 17, 2008

Sheesh, where have I been??

It's been so long, I don't remember what all has happened.

For today, I've had enough.

Trying to plan a family trip to South Carolina to visit the in-laws. My father-in-law has cancer that is not responding favorably to treatment. It's in his bladder. They want to operate to remove the bladder, but can't. All the meds he's been taking have messed up his heart rhythm, and until that straightens out, he remains on the treatment that is offering no cure. They are down, depressed, and need some cheering. My brother-in-law thinks a visit from us would go a long way toward cheering them up and is working the OT to put us on a plane.

I'm awed by his thoughtfulness and generosity. Simply awed.

God knows we are stone cold broke and can't afford to fly out on our own. Someday, we'll be able to return the generosity...someday.

And I just found out today that my brother hasn't been seen or heard from since last Thursday. My paranoid schizophrenic brother. His history with this is long and I won't get into it here. However, the last time he went off meds, the paranoia and delusions set in like flies. He ended up nearly homicidal and certainly suicidal. He's had run-ins with two family members in the last month that weren't pretty. Now no one knows where he is, if he's ok, or what his state of mind is.

Right now, I just want to crawl in bed and sleep for a couple days.